COLUMN: Embracing change
Change.
It’s this burden everyone despises. We don’t like when people, plans or pretty much anything changes and throws us off balance.
Because change is scary, unnerving and many times unpredictable, we set rigid guidelines for ourselves that we cling to in the hope of creating some stability in an unstable world.
We say things like “I’m never going to do this” or “I’ll always believe that,” forgetting to leave room for the possibility that our minds or our situations could alter. Then when we do change (because that’s just human nature), we panic and rush to put a halt on it, fearing looking like a hypocrite or throwing off our entire lives.
We don’t change our majors in college, because it’s expensive. We don’t change silly things like what we order at a restaurant, because it’s risky. We don’t change our minds, because we’re stubborn and afraid of what people will think.
People are punished for changing, like politicians labeled “flip-floppers” or people who are called indecisive, reckless or unsure because they changed.
Why do we allow this? Why do we care what others think? Why can’t we embrace change instead of running from it?
After becoming engaged in December, I decided to get married in the fall of 2013, but with my fiancé Levi’s deployment schedule, that possibility isn’t likely to work for us.
With a planned trip to California and Las Vegas for the Marine Corps Ball coming up in November, Levi and I started talking about the possibility of just getting married now and postponing a huge family ceremony until 2014 when he’s out of the Marines.
It was a rational, well-thought-out plan, but the only problem was that it was something I said I’d never do. I had made my mind up years ago about how my wedding had to be, and straying from the plan and hearing the opinions of friends and family terrified me. What would they think about me changing my mind?
Now that possibility is a reality. I’m going to get married in November, less than two months away from now, because it’s what I want.
So whether it’s getting married or dying your hair or changing your major, do not allow other people or even your past self and thoughts, to box you in. You can change. Life will change. Plans inevitably change. Don’t be afraid.
